Welcome to the Plural Café!
Hello and welcome to Plural Café! Grab a hot cocoa or coffee from the bar, kick back and relax. This is meant to be a friendly and welcoming space for all kinds of plural systems and plural-friendly singlets alike.
For our Privacy Policy and some server information, see our Terms of Service page.
We're also listed on Plural Hub! Check them out on Discord to see more plural communities and resources.
Your moderators are: @starfall
You can contact the moderators through the report feature, by emailing admin@plural.cafe, or by messaging us directly. @Barkeep is mostly unmonitored but we try to check it at least once a week.
What is Mastodon?
From joyeusenoelle's An Increasingly Less-Brief Guide to Mastodon:
Mastodon is Twitter-style social networking combined with email-style instanced servers. It's named after the metal band, but themed after the extinct megafauna.
Each Mastodon instance is independent but networked, like email servers. If you sign up for an email account on gmail.com, you don't automatically have an account on hotmail.com or aol.com, but you can send and receive messages to and from users on hotmail.com and aol.com.
Likewise, if you sign up for an account on mastodon.social, that doesn't make an account for you on every other instance, but you can talk to users from other instances and they can talk to you.
What is Plurality?
From Plurality Resource:
The most simplified definition of the term plural that includes all people who take the label is “someone who shares the same physical body with other individuals.” Such a group is sometimes referred to as a system, though many plural groups use different terminology. Because plurality can take many vastly different forms, it is difficult to expand this definition without excluding someone who might otherwise share characteristics or concerns with most other members of the community. It does seem this basic trait is the only thing groups of people who refer to themselves as plural universally share. In other words, there are many, many ways to be plural, and no two systems are the same even as far as basic characteristics. There are a lot of trends in the community, however, and various types within the umbrella term of plural that seem to be subsets.
There is a prevailing theory in the community that sees plurality as a spectrum going from singlet (one person in one physical body) to median (a term describing groups that have one main member plus others who are somewhat separate) to multiple (a group of distinct individuals in which more than one person can take control of the physical body). Groups who deviate from these subsets are seen as occupying an in-between ground along the spectrum.
More information can be found on More Than One, Healthy Multiplicity, Tulpa.io, or the Blackbirds' Layman's Guide to Multiplicity.
Instance Rules
- Respect the self-identity, experiences, and personhood of others. All kinds of plurality are welcome here, as are all kinds of headmates. At the same time, keep in mind that others may make mistakes or use different terminology than you do.
- Bigotry, hatred, and oppression have no place here. Racism, sexism, ableism, queermisia, xenophobia, fat hate, antisemitism, and islamophobia will all get you at least a talking-to and at worst an instant ban. Exclusionary rhetoric (e.g. asexual exclusion) is also not welcome. TERFs, SWERFs, white supremacists, and neonazis can screw right off.
- Harassment, trolling, flaming, impersonation, and other kinds of abuse are not allowed. Please treat someone blocking one headmate's account as a block of your whole system. Also keep in mind that public gossip / "subtoots" may cross the line into harassment.
- Use content warnings for posts about sex, kink, and genitals. [We also prefer that you use something more specific than the "NSFW" acronym when tagging.]
- Please use content warnings for common triggers:
- abuse
- alcohol and other drugs
- COVID-19
- death
- flashing or rapidly moving images
- food, eating, dieting, and weight loss
- graphic violence, blood, and gore
- misinformation and unreality
- self harm, suicide, and suicidal ideation
- No loli-, shota-, or kodo-con or otherwise sexualized images of minors, fictional or not. No arguing about it either. This isn't the space for that.
- Advertising your own work and the work of others is great, but don't spam or make advertisements that someone else is paying you for.
- Don't do anything that would get us in legal trouble. This includes but may not be limited to:
- Being under 13 years old (body age)
- Advertising full-service sex work
- Credible threats of violence
- Doxxing or otherwise violating people's privacy
- Selling illegal drugs
- Don't take advantage of the rules to try and harm others.
Bots Policy
- Bots should not post on public privacy. Twitter crossposters and similar automated posts can be on public as long as you also respond to people from your account here.
- Bots must be opt-in; that is, they should not follow or interact with accounts that haven't followed or interacted with them first.
- Bots must be clearly identified as a bot with the "This is a bot account" option in their profile.
Federation Policy
- Instances where folks regularly break our rules may be silenced or suspended at any time.
- Now that Mastodon has secure mode, we're not as worried about other folks blocking the same instances we do, but keep in mind that the company you keep does reflect on you, and because of the nature of federation we may find it more expedient to block someone than to deal with the things they federate to us.
- Unmoderated instances and those that make a point of being "free speech" have proven time and again to enable harassment and will be suspended.
- Instances running the Soapbox frontend will be assumed to be full of assholes until proven wrong. Using the fancy software that was created specifically for TERFs is, perhaps unsurprisingly, a strong (but not perfect) predictor of transmisogyny.
The instances that we restrict access to & from can be seen at the bottom of this page. To avoid harassment and legal threats from folks who don't appreciate that we set boundaries, the reason for blocks is only available when you are logged into Plural Café.
If we've blocked your instance and you would like us to review that, send us an email at admin@plural.cafe. We have received 5 of these requests and removed 3 instance blocks after review.
Frequently Asked Questions
Do I really have to use those content warnings on every post about something?
On public posts and replies to your own public posts, yes. For unlisted and followers-only posts, you're welcome to add the tag to your account bio instead so that folks know what they're getting into.
Why do you discourage the term "NSFW" (Not Safe For Work)?
Two reasons.
- It's not specific. It doesn't tell anyone whether they're going to see a short reference to sex, kink, both together, pornography, a dick joke, or a joke about the unsafe use of ladders. Everyone's triggers and tolerance for the different subjects is different, and lumping them all together doesn't help folks make decisions about what they want to read and when they want to read it.
- Because sex work is real work. "NSFW" might be accurate for most workplaces, but it subtly reinforces those standards on everyone.
It's not a rule violation, but we would prefer folks use words like "sex" or "lewd" in their content warnings instead of "NSFW".
Can you give examples of rule 9 (don't take advantage of the rules to try and harm others)?
Sure. One example is sealioning - overwhelming someone with "polite" questions while hiding behind the guidance to be gentle with folks who are still learning. Another that we've seen fairly often is, after someone is told off by a Black person for racist behavior, trying to smear that Black person as transphobic.
Moderator Expectations & Transparency
Moderators are expected to respond to reports and new account requests within 24 hours. Since there's only one of us at the moment and we also have a full time job, keep in mind that it may sometimes take 16 hours or more for us to get the chance to take a look at things, but we can handle most things in about 30 minutes.
Handling reports almost always involves us talking to the folks involved before taking any action, but we aren't afraid to take immediate action in extreme situations. We've immediately suspended accounts from Plural Café for:
- Using the n-word on an account outside of Plural Café
- Complaining about "globalists" (in the anti-semitic conspiracy theory sense) in the replies of someone criticizing white supremacy, while we were typing up a gentle correction to another post of theirs about how free speech, especially in our spaces, still comes with the responsibility not to harm others.
Mastodon gives us these moderation tools:
- Marking images as sensitive
- Deleting posts (they may still be available on other instances, but they won't appear on plural.cafe)
- Issuing warnings
- Temporarily disabling login to plural.cafe
- Hiding an account's posts from anyone who doesn't follow them (a "limit" or "silence")
- Deleting a plural.cafe account or refusing any posts or information about a remote account (a "suspend")
Note that moderators are not able to edit the text or content warning of posts.
Credits
This code of conduct is not directly based on any others, but we spent a fair bit of time reading examples and were inspired by these in particular:
- The Ada Initiative's how-to on designing a code of conduct.
- Django Code of Conduct
- The Technology Transformation Service Code of Conduct
- Citizen Code of Conduct
- Firestorm Collective Anti-Oppression Statement
Domain blocks
Mastodon generally allows you to view content from and interact with users from any other server in the fediverse. These are the exceptions that have been made on this particular server.
Filtered media
Media files from these instances will not be processed or stored, and no thumbnails will be displayed, requiring manual click-through to the original file:
| Instance | Reason |
|---|---|
| wake.st | |
| kinkyelephant.com | |
| majestic.monster | |
| mastodon.cyber-tribal.com | |
| pleroma.weirdart.space | |
| anime.website | |
| csdisaster.club | |
| my.dirtyhobby.xyz |
Silenced instances
Posts from these instances will be hidden in public timelines and conversations, and no notifications will be generated from their users interactions, unless you are following them:
| Instance | Reason |
|---|---|
| botsin.space | |
| cdrom.tokyo | |
| democracy.town | |
| fedi.be | |
| liber.cx | |
| mastodon.online | |
| mastodon.social | |
| mastodon.starrevolution.org | |
| newsbots.eu | |
| pokemon.men | |
| radical.town | |
| resistance.social | |
| soc.safebook.space | |
| social.linux.pizza | |
| todon.eu | |
| xxxtumblr.org | |
| kinkyelephant.com | |
| majestic.monster | |
| mastodon.cyber-tribal.com | |
| pleroma.weirdart.space |
Suspended instances
No data from these instances will be processed, stored or exchanged, making any interaction or communication with users from these instances impossible:
| Instance | Reason |
|---|---|
| 10minutepleroma.com | |
| 434.earth | |
| 4qq.org | |
| 7td.org | |
| a.nti.social | |
| activism.openworlds.info | |
| albin.social | |
| animeabyss.xyz | |
| antivaxxer.icu | |
| archivefedifor.fun | |
| aria.company | |
| artalley.social | |
| aspiechattr.me | |
| aspirant.de | |
| atlas.fedi.live | |
| baraag.net | |
| beehub.org | |
| bikeshed.party | |
| bitcoinhackers.org | |
| blackmesa.space | |
| blimey.social | |
| blob.cat | |
| blovice.bahnhof.cz | |
| boop.link | |
| boseburo.ddns.net | |
| brasileiros.social | |
| brave.cafe | |
| bridgend.online | |
| brighteon.social | |
| buckeye.social | |
| busshi.moe | |
| calculate.social | |
| canberrasocial.net | |
| catgirl.life | |
| cawfee.club | |
| censorship.icu | |
| chat.cdstm.ch | |
| cliterati.club | |
| club.darknight-coffee.org | |
| cock.fish | |
| collapsitarian.io | |
| contrapointsfan.club | |
| coom.club | |
| counter.fedi.live | |
| counter.social | |
| cyberfuck.club | |
| daishouri.moe | |
| dirtytrans.club | |
| distrotoot.com | |
| djsumdog.com | |
| dystopian.space | |
| egirls.gay | |
| enigmatic.observer | |
| eskimo.com | |
| eveningzoo.club | |
| expired.mentality.rip | |
| explosion.party | |
| faithcollapsing.com | |
| fedi.absturztau.be | |
| fedi.samtherapy.net | |
| fedi.site | |
| fedi.valkyrie.world | |
| fedi.vulpes.one | |
| fedi.z0ne.moe | |
| fedicy.allowed.org | |
| fediverse.pl | |
| firebird.zone | |
| floppy.tokyo | |
| fluf.club | |
| fosstodon.org | |
| freecumextremist.com | |
| freesoftwareextremist.com | |
| freespeech.firedragonstudios.com | |
| freespeech.group | |
| freespeech.host | |
| freespeechextremist.com | |
| frennet.link | |
| friends.deko.cloud | |
| friends.nico | |
| fsmi.social | |
| fybuk.com | |
| gab.ai | |
| gab.com | |
| gab.sleeck.eu | |
| gameliberty.club | |
| gamers.exposed | |
| gearlandia.haus | |
| gecekafasi.com | |
| gendercritical.club | |
| gendercritical.space | |
| genitalia.observer | |
| gitmo.life | |
| gleasonator.com | |
| gleasonator.dev | |
| glindr.org | |
| glowers.club | |
| gluten.space | |
| gorf.pub | |
| goyim.app | |
| hacktivis.me | |
| hagra.net | |
| hayu.sh | |
| hentai.baby | |
| herosofbionicals.bigchungus69.club | |
| hitchhiker.social | |
| husk.site | |
| i2p.rocks | |
| iddqd.social | |
| ihatebeinga.live | |
| imbadwithnames.xyz | |
| iscute.moe | |
| jaeger.website | |
| javisst.space | |
| jigglypuff.club | |
| jimlunsford.com | |
| jojo.singleuser.club | |
| jumanji.co | |
| justicewarrior.social | |
| kag.social | |
| kartoffel.cafe | |
| katiehopkinspolitical.icu | |
| kawen.space | |
| kisslolis.moe | |
| kitsune.cafe | |
| kitty.social | |
| kiwifarms.cc | |
| kiwifarms.is | |
| kiwifarms.net | |
| kodlomrazi.ru | |
| kompost.cz | |
| koyu.space | |
| kyot.me | |
| kys.moe | |
| lain.com | |
| lain.sh | |
| lbry.world | |
| leafposter.club | |
| lets.bemoe.online | |
| letsalllovela.in | |
| liberdon.com | |
| libre.tube | |
| librem.one | |
| lifeweb.cc | |
| ligma.pro | |
| linuxrocks.online | |
| liveview.cf | |
| lizards.live | |
| lor.sh | |
| lord.sh | |
| masochi.st | |
| mastodon.ar.al | |
| mastodon.cloud | |
| mastodon.grin.hu | |
| mastodon.hatthieves.es | |
| mastodon.linuxbox.ninja | |
| mastodon.lucci.xyz | |
| mastodon.macsnet.cz | |
| mastodon.madrid | |
| mastodon.org.uk | |
| mastodonspain.masto.host | |
| meisskey.blue | |
| melalandia.tk | |
| mentality.rip | |
| midnightride.rs | |
| mikegerwitz.com | |
| mk.samtherapy.xyz | |
| mobile.co | |
| monads.online | |
| mst.vsta.org | |
| mstdn.foxfam.club | |
| mstdn.io | |
| mu.zaitcev.nu | |
| murky.club | |
| neckbeard.xyz | |
| neenster.org | |
| neko.bar | |
| niu.moe | |
| nixnet.social | |
| nnia.space | |
| noagenda.social | |
| noagendasocial.com | |
| nobodyhasthe.biz | |
| nordenmedia.com | |
| norrebro.space | |
| oneway.masto.host | |
| oursocialism.today | |
| outerheaven.club | |
| panthermodern.net | |
| patch.cx | |
| pawoo.net | |
| paws.moe | |
| paypig.org | |
| peertube.se | |
| peertubenorge.com | |
| phreedom.tk | |
| piggo.space | |
| pirateradio.social | |
| pl.kotobank.ch | |
| pl.pech.tech | |
| pl.pube.tk | |
| pl.skyn3t.in | |
| pl.slash.cl | |
| pl.smuglo.li | |
| pl.thj.no | |
| pl.valkyrie.world | |
| pl.wowana.me | |
| pleroma.cloud | |
| pleroma.cucked.me | |
| pleroma.hatthieves.es | |
| pleroma.mouse.services | |
| pleroma.runfox.tk | |
| pleroma.site | |
| pleroma.soykaf.com | |
| pleroma.strizhakov.dev | |
| pleroma.us | |
| pleroma.wolfie.pw | |
| poa.st | |
| polaris-1.work | |
| political.icu | |
| posting.lolicon.rocks | |
| preteengirls.biz | |
| prout.social | |
| qoto.org | |
| quey.org | |
| rage.lol | |
| rakket.app | |
| raplst.town | |
| rawr-xd.club | |
| rayn.bo | |
| rcsocial.net | |
| redliberal.com | |
| redxen.eu | |
| salesforce.social | |
| santsenques.cat | |
| scarlet.house | |
| search.fedi.app | |
| sendero.social | |
| shigusegubu.club | |
| shitpisscum.mooo.com | |
| shitposter.club | |
| shpposter.club | |
| sinblr.com | |
| skippers-bin.com | |
| sleeck.eu | |
| sleepy.cafe | |
| sneak.berlin | |
| sneed.social | |
| social.ancreport.com | |
| social.beepboop.ga | |
| social.byoblu.com | |
| social.foxfam.club | |
| social.handholding.io | |
| social.hatthieves.es | |
| social.here.blue | |
| social.homunyan.com | |
| social.inex.rocks | |
| social.k1ppl.com | |
| social.privacytools.io | |
| social.quodverum.com | |
| social.sakamoto.gq | |
| social.seattle.wa.us | |
| social.tchncs.de | |
| social.tinfoil-hat.net | |
| social.xeltica.work | |
| societal.co | |
| society.kalli.st | |
| society.oftrolls.com | |
| socnet.supes.com | |
| speakfree.world | |
| spinster.dev | |
| spinster.xyz | |
| springbo.cc | |
| stereophonic.space | |
| strelizia.net | |
| subco.nscio.us | |
| subcon.pub | |
| swampfoxden.com | |
| sylveon.club | |
| take.iteasy.club | |
| tebukuro.pw | |
| the9thcircle.club | |
| theduran.icu | |
| theres.life | |
| thewired.xyz | |
| toast.cafe | |
| toot.icyphox.sh | |
| toot.love | |
| toots.alirezahayati.com | |
| traboone.com | |
| tuusin.misono-ya.info | |
| tweety.icu | |
| twitiverse.com | |
| udongein.xyz | |
| uuuu.bigguys.club | |
| uwu.social | |
| varishangout.net | |
| veenus.art | |
| verita84.com | |
| voicenews.icu | |
| wagesofsinisdeath.com | |
| weeaboo.space | |
| wintermute.fr.to | |
| witches.live | |
| wolfhowl.me | |
| wurm.host | |
| wxw.moe | |
| x0f.org | |
| yggdrasil.social | |
| yorishiro.space | |
| youjo.love | |
| zefirchik.xyz | |
| zeonet.xyz | |
| zetsubou.xn--q9jyb4c | |
| anime.website | |
| csdisaster.club | |
| my.dirtyhobby.xyz |