the Panda system @the_panda_system@plural.cafe

So, #introduction toot!
We're the Panda System and we're very glad to be here.

Nanouk is the host and mainly fronts/toots. Signs toots with 🐼 Interests: #witchcraft, #food, #leatherworking and others

Mask is a protector and often coconscious. Signs with ☯️, interested in #minimalism and witchy stuff.

Atty is a #Viking child and signs with 🐻 - often out when there's fun to be had!, Also #puzzles

Christian is relatively new to this system and probably has a warped sense of justice. Signs with 🕯️Interested in #theology and #cinematography

The cat is a literal cat headmate and therefore doesn't type. When talked about, we use 🐱/🐈 depending on whether they were conscious or in the innerworld.

Kat is our sexual trauma holder and barely fronts. Signs with 💖 She's interested in everything soft, #flowers, #horses and the sea.

If you want, you can give us a follow! Our former main is @pandanouk and we are also on @pandanouk 😊

🐼☯️

Don't worry about us in the next two weeks, we're on vacation with almost no internet! See you soon!

Today was full of things! And now we have to sleep 😴 good night fluffy elephants 😊

🐻

There's a person that is also plural and I want to introduce ourself to them but I haven't talked to them before, we only know each other through a mutual friend. But I want IRL plural people to be comfortable and out together with 😭

🐼

Current level of "in need of a time-out": We find it extremely funny that the mobile Firefox gives us the option to 'switch' to a newly opened tab.

☯️🐻

Welp, that was... A thing.
Just had therapy, and after some encouragement from you all I actually handed in half a page of "I think I'm not alone in my brain" ramblings. My therapist didn't read it at first but I prompted her to do it, and after reading, she asked me if I had done some research of my own already, and what I thought about the definition of DID, and whether that might fit my experience. I was able to tell her that I was torn between "does it sound like me because I want it to" and "does it sound like me because it is" - and she didn't immediately tell me that I didn't fit into the box! In fact, she explained that there was no box, but a continuum, and she wants to explore that with me. I dissociated halfway through her speech (Mask wanted to keep Atty from introducing himself) but I think she's good. She will try to get me into longterm therapy with her. I'm so happy!

🐼

*sigh* Still very unsure whether to tell the therapist about the system. I mean, I should probably do that asap so she doesn't think we are hiding stuff from her, but what if she tells us we've made it all up? sjhgs I hate thiiiis.

(also please don't come and say "you're valid" because that's not really encouraging, it just makes me feel like I'm disappointing you with my invalidity-feelings)

🐼

Doesn't help not to know who's fronting.

Sigh, the self-hatred and - doubt are strong today. And we have no one to talk to about it. Seriously considering to tell the therapist tomorrow, but if she doesn't believe that we're a system, I might believe her and I don't know what to do with that then.

Really wishing we hadn't given up our dance practice when we were 16. It was so fun and I felt so free. I want it back.

💖

How do I explain to someone who still uses "Multiple Personality Disorder" that it's not a cool thing to play someone with several "personalities" while being a singularity, even if it's encouraged to play freaky abnormal outsider characters, and that it's something entirely different from me playing a nonbinary character that doesn't use any pronouns while I Personally Don't Use Pronouns In Everyday Life 😒

Yeah yeah, I cannot know whether they actually are plural or not, but I don't really feel like outing ourself to them? For the slimmest of possibilities for them to be as well? Nah.
Considering to just leave the RPG before the play even starts. We'll see.

🐼

We have a new home screen background with a very boopable snoot 😊

🐼🐻

Yo, plural peeps. Thanks for being here. Really appreciate your visibility.

Hhhhhhhhhhgggghhh...

We're extremely receptive to scent. Having a colleague who is about 30 years older than us practically bathing in our abuser's deodorant without the possibility of opening a window is throwing us slightly into hell. And we have to stay for another 2.5 hours. Hhhhhhhh.

🕯️💖

https://mspsocial.net/@lawremipsum/102322738077087704

I am wondering if there will ever be a time where this brain is not yeeting me into heavy dissociation as soon as I begin to feel sad. Like, I know that doesn't solve my problem, please let me try to do that.
🐼

You do know that all of that crap is thrown over onto our side of the road, right
🕯️💖

Oh well. This is a great start to the night (it's midnight and we have to be at work in the morning) And Spotify is like "welcome to the Panic Room", how fitting.
🐼