rats+ @rats@plural.cafe

"so hows Unity treating you today?"
*gestures to avatar model*
"i see"

one thing I do need though is those mirror glasses things for using tablet in bed with good neck posture. or, could try moving bedside table to actually be beside bed and propping tablet there for sideways Content

evening has been a bit rough but at least new episode of noita wizard to watch

I love calling it that now, youtube guy I like started playing noita, and he keeps calling the game/main character "noita wizard" and I just. love it so much

I wonder what that side of the community is like, now ive spent some time in reasonable, radically inclusive spaces. like... last I heard there were a few PK forks that were "literally identical to pluralkit but only us Good Systems can use it", are they around? did they go the way of systemtime and crash and burn? are they still violating the pluralkit license and closed source or "its open source *doesnt update the repo for months despite changes being made*"? I wonder what support there is like, in those bot support servers.

from what I saw, these exclusionist bots were made by people with either comparable or less skill than myself- sure they can self host a bot from their school laptop (sorry guys I have a zoom call gotta take the bot down DX), but beyond some very basic programming they cant really contribute to their pk fork beyond half baked & fundamentally broken features. and like. being a less skilled programmer is no sin, but you can...kinda tell that when a avid ST user says "I use systemtime because pluralkit is insecure" while ST has known vulnerabilities, that its not /really/ about privacy, or stability, or whatever else. they want an easy fix from a percieved evil, whether or not that evil is actually there

its all scaremongering. from the "PK devs DDOSed my bot, they're evil" (totally untrue, in case anyone is somehow still not aware.) to "you should use our bot, because Bad Systems use that other bot and we cant share a platform or else we're supporting Bad Systems" (...discord has a rampant grooming problem and you're okay with that, then?), and so on... its all just misinformation that spreads, and these are kids & teens (predominantly) that want to be safe online,and will listen to the voice that convinces them, not the voice of reason.

like. I get it. I used to be those kinds of people. but still... it hurts to know the awful pervasiveness of hatred.

I have a lot of thoughts about this stuff, I guess because it was very in my face when I joined the plural Discord community. my nerve pain is starting to do the thing, so I might ramble a bit about things later. not sure.

id love to deep dive into the pervasive harm that the inclusive plural community has done, but its not there. theres "a system and their friends raiding a server", or "some guy harassing someone else", but its no where near on the same scale as the hatred bred by exlus. systems. ill probably still do that anyway, but ill need to dig a lot deeper :P id love to talk about the danger of well. untrusting some unknown party with your intimate system info, but I feel like that needs a longer exposition than I can manage

as a non hashtag user the use of a hashtag here is primarily for comedic affect in a "fellow kids" sense

though from what ive heard using hashtags is good on mastodon? apparently?

I feel like this is a #pluralgang mood :/

im imagining something nice where there are both feet nubs on the keyboard, and feet indents on the desk plank thing, so it interlocks well alongside magnets

the desk plank thing is because i am indecisive and will change my mind about where on my desk i want my keyboard.

its totally beyond my skill level, but fun to think about

possibly some sort of modular case could be fun- maybe with magnets in the base, so that i could attach it to (thing that is attached to my desk) but have the freedom to use it elsewhere easily

as much as i love my current keyboard, as a keyboard enthusiast ill always have more projects i want to build

something like a dactyl manuform with an embedded trackball seems like a really fun project once i learn how to solder, get more comfy using qmk, gain access to a 3d printer, etc etc

ergonomically this seems like a smart move- i find my teething points with my current setup are almost soley from using my mouse (moving my wrists), and i already use my Iris in a 40% layout, so aside from trialling keyboard only computer usage this seems like the most obvious fix to make. and it comforts me knowing that someone else has already done it, lol

once i dial in my ideal tenting angle with my current keyboard, i would love to build a custom case, as the current solution of using bolts for tenting has annoyed me extensively. im not sure how im gonna go about building that, maybe making a prototype out of wood, or commissioning someone to design and print it for me. more likely, i would just learn 3d modelling and pay someone to print it for me lol. decisions...

i think the path would be something like iris and mouse > iris with ploopy nano > iris in custom case, possibly just a big plank with the ploopy embedded > even more esoteric keyboards

flops (happy)

groceries came today and Ellie got me more batteries without asking, I forgot to mention I was on my last 2 for my vr controllers but she bought a bunch anyway :)

also she opened the blind in the spare room a little bit which is big progress, I havent seen outside from spare room in long time

might try and do laundry today

despite the things that made me feel bad today, some things also made me feel good:
(I = someone in our system, this is a collaborative post bc front has been really varied today)

- Ellie gave me leftover food! triangle nacho looking things with avocadoy dip and weird creamy dip and tomatoy dip. tasted super good and I wanna ask her what that was called
- I asked a person for a beta key to their chat client and they gave it to me, AND I talked a little about webhooks & bot development that made me feel proud of how far ive come (2 years ago I didnt know a lot of things I know now).
- I asked a content creator about un censoring swears in his subtitles, and even if he doesnt do it, I was brave
- I got a commission I paid for! its an icon for our sidesystem to use as a pfp and its very pretty
- I talked a bit with pals and variety who I dont often talk to, which was great
- we played vrchat and had lots of fun with chroma and juggs, they taught me how to use the elevator in the convention center world (which i was too embarrassed to ask about) , and I got to spend a bit of time with pewter and belial too

and like. thats a lot of good in one day! not even all the good, I probably forgot a lot! every day has lots of good in it, I just struggle to remember and get overwhelmed. and thats ok, recovery is a process :)

boy we sure do seem to be experiencing a range of emotions, its almost as if we're multiple people or something

I think a lot of my problems are cycle-y because I dont have the memory to remember like... "last time, when this made me sad, I thought 'if only I had done x beforehand' so im going to do x so I dont feel sad" you know?

my memory stuff scares me a lot and I know I get in a loop about it, so I intervene with "there are things I do remember well, those things just arent what I think I should remember and thats ok" and distract myself (as no amount of feeling sad will make me remember better)

despite that I think I sadpost online much more than I realize, and usually for the same reason many times in a row

/almost as if we are different people processing our problems at different rate, dipshit (affectionate)/

internet makes me frustrated but internet also makes us blåhaj so overall internet is ok for now

...speaking of blåhaj its coming in a few days