Feels a bit like A is on break and we’re in “pending” mode:
Still acting mostly like ourselves, but waiting to hear back on something
Really trying to read other people very carefully and try and make up for all the impulsive behavior A causes?
We don’t really have a name for any subsystem/headmate/etc other than A (which is an abbreviation not a one letter name)
But we feel like someone else is fronting and they sort of have consistent enough personality enough to maybe justify a name?
plural feels? affections, ~+
Real frustrated over who’s who and how we be
System stuff? Idk
But overall more excited about enbies tbh
Prob not gonna see em today but texting is fun~
I dunno which of us they met last time we hung out, but maybe we can drop all the anxiety and just be a blushing mess instead
That’s much easier to handle eh?
plural, personal, ---
Who is even writing this?
We don’t understand
We don’t believe it
We feel it but we don’t believe it
Is this A?
Is this how A feels negative emotions?
Or is this one of the others?
Is this despair a subsystem or a behavior of a subsystem?
Are we plural?
Or is all of this something else?
plural, personal, ---
No it’s just us
We’re the problem
Our changes worked out fine for like half a week
But us trying to change things upset some status quo
And we are losing friends over it
And it will get worse until our friendships give up on us
Our friendships always break down when anything changes
The only reason they ever work at all is because we don’t realize we’re being pity-friended
plural, personal, -
A loves to play videogames, but is learning to take a step back from them now and then
stay hydrated, and try and get to bed on time, that sort of stuff
But sometimes it seems like when A takes a step away from the front, our friends treat that as “we only want to talk to A, goodnight” and so only A gets to hang out, and the rest of this system doesn’t get any ramp down or discussion?
Can’t actually tell if it’s us or them?
Maybe they are feeling something similar?
For real, HRT is safer than fucking birth control
plural feels? hm
We still view A as a template, more than a headmate.
It’s not so much that A only thinks on short timescales, but the A’s that are focused on a single task that’s in progress do.
Shifting into an A that is a bot more of a hybrid, the task can be “maintain relationship” and suddenly the behavior is rather different
This stuff is why I’m uncertain about plurality,
I know there are other ways to describe my behavior,
But plurality feels more ... accurate? Accessible? Personal?
plural feels? hm
We often snap when bothered while busy
We are worse while playing video games
Perhaps another way to phrase it is that A is a headmate template that fronts during video games, has trouble giving up the front, and thinks on such short timescales they don’t really want to talk unless it’s related to the current focus
Shifting to another A front or trying to shift to another headmate entirely often results in despair and apologies for snapping
plural, personal, sex, +
I think A was really excited for a sexual encounter way back years ago. Our partner at the time was not as excited and we ended up splitting up over this and some other closeness issues. We just didn't hang out, so we ended up splitting up. We still chat now and then.
A didn't really want to deal with the lack of sexual contact?
we were fine with it overall, but A comes to the front if nobody cares to stop them, and got pushy we guess?
A is kind of pushy right now with our current partner, a little gropey and handsy. Similarly gets pushed back, but maybe since A doesn't have to front all the time anymore, it's not as big of a deal?
it can feel like it's just cognitive dissonace: wanted to sex + don't want to hurt feelings
we don't really know if this is at all a useful way to process this
but we don't see why that dissonance really needs to be resolved to be content with the way our life is going
"Welcome to Magic School. Here is your schedule."
"This is just 'Ethics' and 'Human rights' and things like that."
"Correct, that's the first year curriculum."
"Do we have to learn all this?"
"Of course! What do you think this is, software engineering?"
#MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories
@nebula I feel you! If I had to choose between 1000 followers and one person that likes to hug when hugs are due, then I'd pick the single person without second thoughts. *sends e-hugs*
We like the rush and the challenge of spicy foods even if they’re too spicy compared to our usual.
Spicy sweet chili is always better than flamin hot, but once a family sized bag of flamin is obtained, A wants to slowly eat the whole thing
A won’t try to replace it if it gets thrown out, so we take a step back, and maybe A stops fronting for long enough to toss the bag?
We hate the cliche but, it’s also a reflection of some of our other habits?
re: mental illness, mental health, DID, media portrayals, ~
watching the slightly older video on same channel linked in the description.
think we heard the phrase "traumagenic" and "endogenic" and this youtube person doesn't ever discuss anything but traumagenic?
also continues to use the word "alter"
seems like this person has mostly interesting views on this stuff,
and focuses on sending people to better resources,
but hasn't viewed many of those resources themself?
Communication is very difficult
No lewds here please.
Plural Café is a community for plural systems and plural-friendly singlets alike, that hopes to foster a safe place for finding and interacting with other systems in the Mastodon fediverse.