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plural.cafe instance meta (rules rewrite) 

Hello folks! @starfall speaking, we spent some time yesterday rewriting the rules section with an eye on making paragraphs shorter and our values more explicit.

They haven't taken effect yet; the draft can be seen at hackmd.io/@starfall/plural-caf

Some things are added to the old rules, not just reworded:

* "blatant advertising" -> "corporate advertising", with a specific exception for self-promotion
* explicitly sex and kink positive, but these must still be content warned appropriately
* explicitly sex worker positive, give or take some legal requirements
* required content warnings section added, with some of the most common triggers we know of
* some changes to the bot account policy - bots must be opt-in, not opt-out, automated posts shouldn't be on public
* more explicit federation policy around suspending some servers that don't block servers we suspend

Feel free to comment and suggest changes here or @ us directly.

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anybody else feel like birthdays are super weird. i have a birthday but its not like we're gonna have a party for it or anything but we have a party for the body's birthday even tho that may not even be fox's birthday since we have no idea if hes actually the original or not lol

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multiplicity may day 21 (1/2) - a blurb about institutional ableism 

gonna go ahead and say that we're pretty strong believers in anti-psychiatry, and avoid interacting with the mental health system as much as possible. i don't think we're the right people to soapbox about it because we don't have the full scope of the history but it's really bad & intersects with every other form of oppression (particularly racism and misogyny)

so when we use the disorder language we're usually doing that because it's more familiar than the alternative language & because resources that are labeled that way have helped us

and also a bit to reclaim agency by using the system's terms without going through the system, though i don't think that's a particularly useful form of reclamation as it still tends to normalize them, so we might stop.

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Bunposting 

A bunny wearing a red sweater vest chases a roomba because it has a bunch of carrots strapped onto it.

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meta (bi discourse & subtoot) 

To avoid hurting folks, we hold ourselves to one short rule. It's particularly applicable in situations like this:

don't define words for other people.

There's a difference between expressing discomfort at something & telling folks that they aren't who they say they are. One sure-fire way to know where the line is, is when you start looking up etymology to tell other people they don't know what they mean by the word they're using.

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typing about our hobbies and i just realized that we're probably wrong about when i showed up

because i have a distinct memory in first person of playing lego creator in ~2011 and genuinely meaning "i'm not very competitive"

that goes straight to third person as we steal the winning piece from someone who was assembling their contraption and cackle at them

i was very confused at the time

-- devin

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plural.cafe custom emoji updates 

We updated a bunch of emoji on Saturday night! We can't figure out how to get the emoji picker to update though.

But we're now on Mutant Standard 2020.04! If the emoji picker does ever update, we've also hidden the color variants to make it faster, and written up a page to tell you what the shortcode is for each color: devin.monsterpit.me/ms-shortco

We've also added @chr 's dragon emoji! :dragnuwu:

& a new pack of sparkling pride hearts :sparkling_heart_enby:

these emoji were renamed: (the old versions still work for now)
:ms_nail_varnish_clw: and variants -> :ms_nail_polish_clw:
:ms_confused: -> :ms_dizzy_face:
:ms_triangular_flag: -> :ms_triangle_flag:

these emoji were removed: (but still show in the picker)
:ms_privacy:
:angry_horns_ms: (use :ms_imp_angry:)
:angry_steam_ms: (use :ms_angry_steam:)
:over18: (use :ms_18_plus:)
:ok_paw_x80: (use :ms_ok_hand_paw_k3:)
:open_paws_x80: (use :ms_open_hands_paw_k3:)
:paw_x80: (use :ms_hand_paw_k3:)

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...whats with partners often being the more likely ones to react badly to plural folks coming out? i had this happen too.

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how many fluff could a fluffy fluff fluff if a fluffy fluff could fluff fluff

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I absently read the headline "Exercise can make the brain function at a level five years younger" and the first thought that floated into my head was "How awful that must be if you're a five-year-old who works out regularly"

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(just over) a year ago we wrote We're Going to Need a Bigger Bed, our polyamorous shipping one-blog-post tabletop RPG

it is still yet to be playtested!
weld.eerie.garden/blog/2019/05 here it is ✨

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im starting a subculture called sincerecore where we all just like things

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re: important quote from article, intersectionality, black trans men, feel free to boost 

"By attempting to conceptualize shared female experience independently of race, sex-class theory upholds white womanhood and manhood as definitive of gendered experience. In reality, however, Black trans men are frequently denied the presumption of innocence shared by the implicitly white “female sex class” even before transition. The moral credit of perfect victimhood which I feared transition would take from me was never a unifying trait of womanhood to begin with."

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important quote from article, intersectionality, black trans men, feel free to boost 

"[T]rans men’s relationship to gender cannot be understood by adding the privilege of maleness to the oppression of transness; the interaction between these axes substantively transforms both such that it generates an experience qualitatively different from either alone.

This qualitative difference is particularly salient for Black trans men and transmasculine people, whose experiences at the intersection of race, gender, and trans status are especially ill-captured by a sex-class approach. The assumption that masculinity necessarily means freedom from gender oppression ignores how race/ism is always gendered, and in particular how Black masculine people are gendered as inherently dangerous (and targeted for anti-Black violence on the basis of that “danger”)."

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Javascript: write anything, runs anyway.

whether it does what you thought it'd do is another story.

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"my last name is 20% cooler than 'brown'"

- Tiana, 2k20

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Trying to interact with NTs when you need help is hard. They just assume I think like them and get annoyed when I can’t.

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Plural Café

Plural Café is a community for plural systems and plural-friendly singlets alike, that hopes to foster a safe place for finding and interacting with other systems in the Mastodon fediverse.